Sunday, January 30, 2011

Awesome party dip

I have to give props to Rachel Ray...this dip is easy and tasty, and always the thing to go at a party.

Creamy Olive Dip

1 pkg cream cheese, room temperature (8oz, I use light)
1cup part-skim ricotta
1 jar small stuffed manzanilla (green) olives, drained well
1 clove of garlic
Salt and pepper

In a food processor combine all ingredients until smooth.

Serve with endive leaves, celery and carrot sticks. Also awesome on crackers.

See? Totally easy.

And addicting.



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Saturday, January 22, 2011

Would you want to know?

I found a great web design candidate the other day on LinkedIn. Via email, we set up an interview for Thursday.

The last email I received from the candidate read:

"The form has been filled out. I look forward to meeting you tomorrow at 1.

On an important note, I wish to be upfront: I don't hear too well. I read lips and communicate just fine in a quiet setting. Asides from phones, it's hardly an issue in the workplace."

Now of course the only thing I could stress about was how I was going to interview this candidate, knowing he was hard of hearing? What if I caught myself talking louder? What if I made an idiot of myself?

On the other hand, was it better to know so I was prepared?

Would YOU want to know???


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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Is giving the finger considered a command?

I like to think I'm a law-abiding citizen. I pay my (ridiculously over-priced) taxes. I clear the sidewalk in front of my house of snow for the mailman. And when I'm driving, I only use my cell phone when I'm 'hands-free'.

In fact, if I see you driving and either: a) holding your phone to your ear b) holding your phone and yelling into it while it's on speaker or c) texting, there's a pretty good chance I'm screaming obscenities at you. Especially if you're driving like an asshat.

So in my plight to always be hands-free while behind the wheel, I tried to use the voice-activated dialing on my phone. Look at me! Setting an example for thousands of law breakers!

The other morning I'm driving into work and I thought I'd check in with my dad. I click the little button on the side of the phone.

"Say a command." the nice female automated voice says. We'll call her Lana.

ME: "Call Mom and Dad."

(pause)

LANA: "Say a command."

ME: "CALL MOM AND DAD!" (screaming. Like an idiot)

LANA: "Did you say, 'Call Jen Smith?"

ME: "NO."

LANA: "Did you say, 'Call Boss At Home'?"

What??

ME: "NO! NO I DIDN'T!"

LANA: "Calling Boss At Home."

ME: "NO! UNDO! CANCEL! DON'T CALL! STOP CALLING!!!"

LANA: "Say a command."

ME: "Lana what are you thinking???"

LANA: "Calling Paul's Pizza."



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Sunday, January 16, 2011

this wagon sucks.

In case you can't hear us lamenting for drinks in your neck of the neighborhood, Mr. KK and I are on the wagon for the month of January.

Truthfully, it hasn't been that bad. I'm surprised I haven't floated away with all of the seltzer I've been drinking. We've been sleeping well, flushing out the old system, and saving money.

Saturday morning, after a night out with my uncle from California, I woke up feeling hungover. Which is suspect, considering I had zero alcohol, and basically drank my weight in club soda.

WTF?

Now, I wouldn't have minded waking up like that if I had actually HAD a drink. Because normally, these nights out for dinner with him consist of he and I going martini for martini, sharing the same old stories and having a good ol' time.

Instead, I sipped on my gigantic water, jealously eying my uncle as he sucked the plump, green olives dry of vodka. Downing one, then two, then an unnecessary third dry martini. Asking us the same questions four and five times. Squinting at me over the rim of his glass. Slurring just a bit.

Three martinis and Saturday morning he popped right up, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Ready to start the day.

17 glasses of water and I'M the one who wakes up feeling hungover???

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Apparently my new year's resolution wasn't to blog more

Well, it's 2011. It feels a little late to bore you little with my resolution blog (which would consist of: do more things for myself, find more time to write, and sell my house...and not necessarily in that order).

But I will ask you to have a drink for me, because Mr. KK and I are on the wagon. January is detox month. And besides my longing for white cranberry martinis, ice cold beers in frosty mugs, and glasses of wine by the fireplace, I hardly miss drinking at all.

(perhaps my new year's resolution is to be more sarcastic. That I can do no problem)

Our house renovation project is slowly coming to a close. Besides our countertops, the big stuff is pretty much done. It's the small, annoying, time-consuming stuff that's left. When we went toilet shopping a few weeks ago, I thought nothing could be worse. Then I spent four hours on Sunday filling in nail holes in door and window trim with putty and my finger. Now THAT'S what I call a fun weekend. Between that and no drinking, Mr. Kk and I really know how to live it up.

And I wish I had the strength to tell you about our actual new year's eve, when Mr. KK's friends invited us over, then two weeks later made other plans to go out. WTF? I hate to complain, because it was a blessing in disguise. I wasn't feeling well, and we got to stay in and cook a yummy supper and drink and play games by the fireplace. It was a really nice way to end a really shitty year. And I'm sorry, but can someone politely ask Dick Clark to retire? I love America's Teenager as much as the next guy, but watching him is tough. I think even Ryan Seacrest can take over the countdown.

2011 is already shaping up to be an exciting year. We're buried under 18 inches of snow, giving me yet another day off. I made 2 placements at work this week. My grandmother is turning 90 in a few weeks. 2010 is just a distant memory. And I like it like that.

Happy new year, almost a fortnight late!

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