Ugly personality, 8 kids and straying husband aside

What the hell is going on with Kate's hair?

Like, what IS that hair in the back? It's like the reverse mullet or something.

Jamie Foxx, it's over

I've blogged before about how difficult is it for me to break up with people, but this time around, I'm having no trouble whatsoever.

Bye Jamie. You're done. Finished. Gone-zo. I'm erasing you from my cell phone and de-friending you on FB.

You've basically annoyed me for quite some time now. I was with you when you were a comedian. But then that wasn't enough and you wanted to be an actor. And still, you pushed on and invaded the music world. And now? A mentor? Really? After you publicly have to apologize for the not-so-nice things you said about little Miley Cyrus?

I mentioned my dislike for Jamie over Sunday dinner and found out that I'm not the only one who's ready to call it splitsville with celebs.

Mr. KK has had enough of Beyoncee. He's tired of seeing her everywhere. (I'm not in total agreement with this...she doesn't bug me half as much as she bugs him).

Mr. KK's uncle, has called it quits with Matt Lauer. When everyone's wondering 'where in the world' he could be, I know my uncle-in-law isn't going to be one of those looking for him.

How about you? Any celebs that you just can't stand?

I'm the only stupid person without a smart phone

If you read this blog, you know that I'm not the hippest when it comes to technology. I tend to fight it, mainly because it scares me.

Because of this, I've had the same phone for about 4 years. It's old and flips open and (gasp!) can't even receive picture texts.

But, alas, my phone is starting to show her age.

She doesn't hold her charge well.

When she's tired, she just shuts herself off.

And she's old and slow and embarrassed to come out around all the new guys out there.

So I'm going to upgrade to a smarter phone.

Besides not really needing a fancy phone, I've been fighting getting a phone with email because I didn't want to always be in contact with work. I didn't want them to be able to find me at all hours and send emails and expect me to be at their beck and call every minute of the day. I do this with people whom I know have these phones...send an email and expect a response. Why wouldn't others expect the same from me?

But I can't hold out any longer. It's actually becoming more and more difficult to NOT have access to my email. The phone will prevent me from logging into the computer (and sometimes even setting it up) and having a million emails to go through on Monday morning.

Yes, it will make my life easier.

But what's not easy? Is choosing which phone to get.

Should I get a crackberry or an iphone?

Both have their ups and downs...

Which do YOU guys like?

You know what's awesome?

Being totally tipsy at work.

A glorious, sunny warm Friday afternoon, and I've enjoyed a few cocktails.

Anywho, this weekend I'm headed back to the city to meet up with some of my old roommates from when I worked in Disney.*

Three of us are meeting up for a day in the city, and a fourth is meeting us for dinner. We're from up and down the East Coast, so it's really exciting to be seeing them again.

We had some crazy times down in Disney...from my 6 months down there, all I remember is jello shots before heading out to Cast Member Thursdays at Pleasure Island, nickel beers at Phineas Fogg's and $1 frozen drinks at Chillers downtown, and being completely wasted at midnight mass on Christmas Eve. (not one of my better moments)

The four of us haven't been in the same room since C's wedding in 2002.

I haven't seen G in 2 years.

I haven't seen C in 4 years.

And I haven't seen S in 7 years.

Imagine the Sex And The City Girls meeting for brunch, but instead of catching up on their week, they'll be catching up on the decade.

*Boy, do I have stories for YOU about Disney...you'll never look at the Mouse the same way again...

interview etiquette

I just interviewed someone who just said "fuck" during our meeting.

Twice.

Is anyone else old school and thinks that's just a little...weird/wrong/odd/crazy/telling/ballsy?

a tree for earth day?

I accidentally just swallowed a grapefruit seed.

When I was little, I used to think that if I swallowed seeds, a tree would grow inside my body.

Part of me is still "little", and slightly worried.

(Did you read about that guy who inhaled a seedling and a TREE was growing in his lung???)

It could happen...

when I'm hungry, i IM about food

this whole conversation with a coworker happened within one minute.

KK: i ate subway the other day
KK: my old veggie and cheese
KK: it was pretty good this time
KK: overstuffed
KK: with southwest chipotle sauce
KK: nice kick
CW: oooh
CW: never tried it with that
KK: extra pickles and jalapenos
KK: very tasty
CW: did they give you extra pickles?
KK: she did
KK: extra everything
KK: she could not have cared less about me or my sub
KK: and that's how she acted when making it
CW: but at least you got the pickles!
KK: yes
KK: plus a million sighs
KK: and eye rolls
KK: those are free too

The T-shirts don’t lie…I DO heart NY

Before this weekend, I didn’t love New York. I tolerated New York. I used it for it’s spectacular Broadway shows, over-crowded airports, and – for a short while – mediocre employment.

But after spending Birthday Spectacular Weekend there, I’m singin’ a different tune.

It was the best birthday EVER, thanks to Mr. KK for planning such a wonderful time and to Mother Nature, who could not have blessed us better weather.

We ate and drank our way through the Big Apple…I could have stayed there for another week, if I didn’t have to return to this messy desk and if I somehow came across a cash windfall.

The only way to recap such a superlative weekend, is to do it in, well, superlatives.

Most Touristy Thing We Did
The double-decker bus tour! There really is no better way to see the city. We did the Downtown Loop and could hop off and on whenever we wished. It was sunny and 75 as we rode atop the bus, taking pictures of EVERYTHING (forget about being in NYC, it was as if we had never been out of the house. “Ooh! Look! A building! And people! And pigeons!”)

Most UNtouristy Thing We Did
Took the subway BOTH WAYS to dinner on Friday night…and found the restaurant without asking for help once.

Worst Tour Guide
The woman we had on our first leg of the trip. Imagine Susan Boyle from Britain’s Got Talent – minus the accent. She talked to us like she was reciting a script in her head. At once point, we turned the corner and she said this, “Notice the mermaids on the second floor of the building carved out of stone. They stay there all day long and look down at the people on the streets. Hello, Ladies, how are you today?”

Best Tour Guide
When we hopped back on the bus in SoHo, we breathed a sigh of relief. This guy could have been Al Roker’s twin. He was funny and entertaining and he knew his shit about the city.

Best Nugget Of Info I Learned
If you go to a different bar every night of the year, it would take you 10 years to hit every bar in Manhattan. (that’s one crazy hangover!)

Grossest Thing We Saw
Pile of human poop at the base of the steps to the subway. Complete with used toilet paper.

Most Over-The-Top Meal Presentation
David Burke’s Townhouse
Best In Show: While we were sitting at the bar waiting for our table, the staff brought out fried calamari and truffle French fries to munch on…and they were in a mini red Radio Flyer wagon. I kid you not. We ate out of a wagon.
Runner-Up: my dessert was called “Opera In The Park”. It consisted of cappuccino ice cream and a chocolate and coffee mouse-type cake. On top on the cake, was a mini PARK BENCH (hence, Opera in the Park) made out of chocolate.

Best 'OMG, I Can't Believe It!' Moment
Finding – completely by accident – the little wine bar that we went to 8 years ago in SoHo. We always see that picture of us sitting at that bar and think, “That place was SO great…we had such a good time…I wish I knew the name of the place.” We found it! And had lunch there again, this time outside at a sidewalk table…yummy flatbread pizza, sauteed calamari and refreshing white wine.

Best Bathroom
Our hotel lobby. One big room had 6 individual doors off it, each containing a toilet and sink. Each mini bathroom was named after a different vice/personality trait and each had a theme to go along with it. Vain was decorated in all mirrors; Envy was all green; Glam was done up in all gold; Macho had deer-horn light fixtures. It was trés cool.

Craziest Waitress
That would be our ‘seductress’ from Friday night at Butter. She would practically throw her body across the table and push out her chest in a throaty whisper would say things like, “Let me tell you about our specials” and “I love the lamb” and “Is everything to you liking?” Her signature move: the head tilt with hair falling over one eye and batting her eyelashes. It’s a skill, my friends, and she has mastered it.

Best Hotel Moment
Returning from a long day walking around on Saturday (plus a few drinks at the hotel bar!) to find a bottle of Prosecco and a card from the hotel wishing me a happy birthday.

Most Paris Hilton-esque Thing I Saw
A poodle staying in our hotel, who had a more extensive wardrobe than I did for the weekend.

Strangest Breakfast
Had my first Gray's Papaya hot dog with sauerkraut, mustard and ketchup Saturday morning in Greenwich Village. Yum!

And by complete coincidence, I'm headed back to NYC this weekend to meet up with some old friends. I'm ready for another great weekend!

Celebrating Jesus, my birthday and a good night's sleep

(I’ve been a slacker blog poster due to work overload. And I hate to use work as an excuse, but I am.)

First and most importantly, yesterday was my birthday!

It was a birthday I will never forget, too. Not because I had spectacular plans, but because I spent it with coworkers. We had been working on a big new business pitch, which conveniently fell on my birthday. Everyone was very sweet and kept wishing me a happy birthday, and even the President got everyone drinks at the stroke of midnight to toast me. (we drank those drinks in a conference room rehearsing our presentation, but still, it was a very nice gesture).

My real celebration is this weekend, when Mr. KK is taking me to NYC. The weather is going to be beautiful and even though I’ve been to the city a million times, I’m going to be a total tourist. I’ve even requested that we do one of those double-decker bus tours. I want to be THAT cheesy.

Okay, back to Jesus.

We hosted Easter again this year, and after working crazy hours, and even on Good Friday, I never thought I’d pull it off. Miraculously, though, everything fell into place.

The menu:

Individual antipasto
(some day I’ll tell you about my trip to the Italian Market, that was supposed to open at 8am, but decided to open at 8:30am instead, so I spent 40 minutes IN LINE – yes, there was a line around the building…it was Good Friday after all – and ended up only spending 11 minutes – and $89! – inside)

Crown Roast Of Pork with a garlic rosemary crust
(which was cooked to perfection)

Cornbread, sausage, apple and rosemary stuffing

Mashed potatoes
(my mom’s secret recipe)

String beans and shallots

Brussel sprouts with prosciutto

Dessert was my mother-in-laws pies – wheat pie and rice pie.

After cleaning up from dinner, I literally sat on the couch to rest for five minutes and ended up falling into a dead sleep for an hour and a half! I was THAT tired from working so much. I woke up and pretty much the whole family was sitting around staring at me. Oops!

And finally, last night was the first night in 2 weeks that I got more than 5 hours of sleep. It was wonderful…but I definitely need some more.

Also, I HATE Laguardia Airport. I will NEVER fly out of there again. It was a little windy on Tuesday and they went into panic mode and closed many of the runways. The pilot had this to say: “Looks like 25th in line to take off.”
Twenty-fifth??? Have you ever heard of something so ridiculous?

Also, Happy Birthday Mom! I’ll never be able to top the gift I gave you 35 years ago…me! :)

when it rains, the bartender pours

If we weren't going to meet good friends of ours for lunch on Saturday, I would have stayed home in my pajamas on the couch. It was that kind of day – rain and wind, damp and raw.

I'd been working like crazy for the past week, including working on Good Friday, when I should have been making the Easter pies and ham pie with my mother-in-law.

But Saturday was all mine.

I was off to the salon early for a long-overdue manicure and pedicure. And even though I swore to myself I would get NEW colors this time, I ended up with my old standbys: Essie Mademoiselle on my nails and OPI Dutch Tulips on my toes.

We headed out to Mystic in the monsoon-like weather, telling ourselves that it would clear and we'd be driving back in sunshine.

Mystic is my kind of town: full of old houses and charm. Plus, it's on the water...what more could you want? I love the clapboard houses with plaques that say "Build in 1846" and widow's peaks and wrap-around porches. If it wouldn't triple my commute time I'd move there tomorrow.

Our friends were already at AZU when we got there. It was a cute and trendy place, right on Main Street. I took a cue from my friend T and joined her in a yummy pomegranate martini. We talked and laughed and eventually had some delicious food – lobster mac and cheese, mussels, shrimp cocktail...followed by an ahi tuna BLT with spicy mayo. I also had a second pom-tini.

I could have had another, but found myself drinking on the slow side (for me) to keep the pace with T, who was drinking a little more slowly.

We got so wrapped up in talking and eating and drinking that our sloshy lunch lasted 3 hours!

We stumbled out of lunch – back into the rain – and walked to our cars. And by randomness, our cars were parked on a side street one car away from each other. I love when stuff like that happens.

Despite the weather, it was a wonderful way to spend an otherwise unwonderful rainy Saturday.

Not funny ha ha

My first thought this morning was how excited I was that I got to sleep in until 6:45am.

I'm sure he misses my sparkling personality, too

My lack of posts are due to my overabundant workload.

My apologies.

Because I've been working so many late hours, Mr. KK and I have barely seen each other. When I get home he's asleep and when I leave in the morning, he's still in dreamland.

(Plus, when talking to a coworker I was referencing my office and called it "home". That's a whole other depressing story.)

So in our daily two-minute catch-up chats that we're able to have, this conversation occurred:

MR. KK: "I'm going to go to my parents' house for dinner and...oh. Gross."
KK: "What? What's the matter?"
MR. KK: "I think Vito threw up on the new rug."
KK: "Uh oh." Laughing.

I am not laughing because my little Vito was sick. Nor am I laughing that our new rug has vomit on it again (the first time was from my inlaws' dog Dino). This made me laugh because as tough as Mr. KK is, and the fact that he can watch gross slasher movies while I hide my eyes, vomit makes him gag. He can't stomach it. I do all of the vomit clean-up in the house.

MR. KK: "I'm going to throw up just thinking about cleaning it."
KK: "If you didn't miss me being at home before, you sure as hell do now."

the KK bailout plan

I have the shopping bug, I don't know what it is.

I am single-handedly saving the economy.

Vote for me in 2012!

Guiness Book Of World Shopping Records

I am trying to do my part by shopping and stimulating the economy. (Also, I need new clothes)

Yesterday I went to the Banana Republic outlet.

I purchased:

2 knit tops
1 pair of pants
1 cropped jacket
1 dress shirt (for Mr. KK)
1 sweater (for Mr. KK)
2 enamel bracelets (not for Mr. KK)

Grand Total: $110

Total Savings: $183

Am I the only one who feels a ridiculous high when I get good deals and save money?

On to the next store!

Touché Mr. KK, Touché

After confessing my buying tirade through Target, Mr. KK informs me that he spent $110.85 at the home and garden center on his way home from work.

I've taught him well.

(BTW, we have enough fertilizer to put green grass on the Sahara)

I'm putting myself on notice

In what could only be described as the fastest and most damaging drive-by shopping event ever, I managed to go into Target for gift wrap and a card, and emerge with $109.53 worth of items in just 15 minutes.

Sometimes, I even amaze myself.

Procrastination Post

I should totally be writing concepts for work, but blogging is much more fun.

Thanks to DiDi over at The Sorority for tagging me, and making it easy for me to sneak in a quick post.

1. What is your favorite word?
Gig


2. What is your least favorite word?
Moist


3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
humor and laughter


4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
ignorance


5. What sound or noise do you love?
garlic sizzling in olive oil on the stove


6. What sound or noise do you hate?
nails on a chalkboard


7. What is your favorite curse word?
douche bag...or DB for short

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
party planner


9. What profession would you not like to do?
mortician


10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
"What the hell are YOU doing up here?"

(ok, back to work!)