The T-shirts don’t lie…I DO heart NY

Before this weekend, I didn’t love New York. I tolerated New York. I used it for it’s spectacular Broadway shows, over-crowded airports, and – for a short while – mediocre employment.

But after spending Birthday Spectacular Weekend there, I’m singin’ a different tune.

It was the best birthday EVER, thanks to Mr. KK for planning such a wonderful time and to Mother Nature, who could not have blessed us better weather.

We ate and drank our way through the Big Apple…I could have stayed there for another week, if I didn’t have to return to this messy desk and if I somehow came across a cash windfall.

The only way to recap such a superlative weekend, is to do it in, well, superlatives.

Most Touristy Thing We Did
The double-decker bus tour! There really is no better way to see the city. We did the Downtown Loop and could hop off and on whenever we wished. It was sunny and 75 as we rode atop the bus, taking pictures of EVERYTHING (forget about being in NYC, it was as if we had never been out of the house. “Ooh! Look! A building! And people! And pigeons!”)

Most UNtouristy Thing We Did
Took the subway BOTH WAYS to dinner on Friday night…and found the restaurant without asking for help once.

Worst Tour Guide
The woman we had on our first leg of the trip. Imagine Susan Boyle from Britain’s Got Talent – minus the accent. She talked to us like she was reciting a script in her head. At once point, we turned the corner and she said this, “Notice the mermaids on the second floor of the building carved out of stone. They stay there all day long and look down at the people on the streets. Hello, Ladies, how are you today?”

Best Tour Guide
When we hopped back on the bus in SoHo, we breathed a sigh of relief. This guy could have been Al Roker’s twin. He was funny and entertaining and he knew his shit about the city.

Best Nugget Of Info I Learned
If you go to a different bar every night of the year, it would take you 10 years to hit every bar in Manhattan. (that’s one crazy hangover!)

Grossest Thing We Saw
Pile of human poop at the base of the steps to the subway. Complete with used toilet paper.

Most Over-The-Top Meal Presentation
David Burke’s Townhouse
Best In Show: While we were sitting at the bar waiting for our table, the staff brought out fried calamari and truffle French fries to munch on…and they were in a mini red Radio Flyer wagon. I kid you not. We ate out of a wagon.
Runner-Up: my dessert was called “Opera In The Park”. It consisted of cappuccino ice cream and a chocolate and coffee mouse-type cake. On top on the cake, was a mini PARK BENCH (hence, Opera in the Park) made out of chocolate.

Best 'OMG, I Can't Believe It!' Moment
Finding – completely by accident – the little wine bar that we went to 8 years ago in SoHo. We always see that picture of us sitting at that bar and think, “That place was SO great…we had such a good time…I wish I knew the name of the place.” We found it! And had lunch there again, this time outside at a sidewalk table…yummy flatbread pizza, sauteed calamari and refreshing white wine.

Best Bathroom
Our hotel lobby. One big room had 6 individual doors off it, each containing a toilet and sink. Each mini bathroom was named after a different vice/personality trait and each had a theme to go along with it. Vain was decorated in all mirrors; Envy was all green; Glam was done up in all gold; Macho had deer-horn light fixtures. It was trés cool.

Craziest Waitress
That would be our ‘seductress’ from Friday night at Butter. She would practically throw her body across the table and push out her chest in a throaty whisper would say things like, “Let me tell you about our specials” and “I love the lamb” and “Is everything to you liking?” Her signature move: the head tilt with hair falling over one eye and batting her eyelashes. It’s a skill, my friends, and she has mastered it.

Best Hotel Moment
Returning from a long day walking around on Saturday (plus a few drinks at the hotel bar!) to find a bottle of Prosecco and a card from the hotel wishing me a happy birthday.

Most Paris Hilton-esque Thing I Saw
A poodle staying in our hotel, who had a more extensive wardrobe than I did for the weekend.

Strangest Breakfast
Had my first Gray's Papaya hot dog with sauerkraut, mustard and ketchup Saturday morning in Greenwich Village. Yum!

And by complete coincidence, I'm headed back to NYC this weekend to meet up with some old friends. I'm ready for another great weekend!