1. Receive beautifully handmade invitation to surprise retirement party
2. Check calendar for availability
3. Call one of the 27 phone numbers provided and RSVP
oh, and for those of you (um, like FOUR) that have actually responded that you'll be there via voicemail, while I'm completely thrilled that you have common decency and respect, when it says "RSVP with your lunch choice" and then lists three different options, I need you to RSVP WITH YOUR LUNCH CHOICE.