Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Star Gazing

I had a celebrity sighting yesterday in NYC. Chi McBride was having a meeting in Starbucks.

It’s more like a “celebrity glimpse” because:

A. I was not the one who recognized him
B. I still didn’t think it was him after being told one TV show and one movie he’d been in and
C. I’m still all like, “Who???”

(my apologies, Chi!)

As much as I love celebrities and E! Entertainment and Life & Style magazine, I’m still a loser when it comes to spotting celebs on the street.

I’ve seen very few A-listers. Zero pics. No crazy conversations. No used cocktail napkins.

I’ve probably walked by many of them but I’m too clueless to spot them (or they look too much like their “before” photos; I doubt Kate Hudson is walking down the street in her Oscars gown).

One time I did see someone was when I was in Vegas 12 years ago; I had two sightings in the same day (I know, pretty lame for Vegas), especially at the Hard Rock.

I was playing poker next to Darius Rucker, Mr. Hootie himself (sans Blowfish). We made some small talk. He got some decent hands. (I can’t take full credit here – I only realized it was him when the dealer said, “Hello, Mr. Rucker. Good to see you.”)

About an hour later there was lots of commotion over by the slots and there was Jenny McCarthy! Not “I’m-all-dating-Jim-Carrey-and-we-laugh-24-7” Jenny, but old school Jenny, fresh off her Singled Out gig.

She was a vision of platinum hair, Daisy Dukes and tripled-coated mascara lashes surrounded by many big bodyguards dressed in black.

After that, I had a celebrity dry spell.

My uncle, who lives in California, sees celebrities more often than I see my mother.

“I was just in line behind Ian Ziering getting coffee – what a down-to-earth guy!”

Or:

“I ran into Rod Stewart and Rachel Hunter on the street outside of a restaurant. Boy, she towers over him!”

And my favorite:

“I saw Matthew Broderick when I was leaving St. Patrick’s cathedral. I lit a candle for you.”

My last celebrity sighting was John Malkovich. He was eating lunch with his wife and kids next to us on Newbury Street in Boston. I actually was the one who recognized him. I think my revelation went something like this, “Hey, it’s that actor that had that movie made about him with his name in the title. Cameron Diaz was in it, and she was all nutso with crazy hair.” Not surprisingly, my parents had no idea what I was talking about.

Okay, back to John. He is one weird dude.

It was summer, so he was in shorts (fine) but he was wearing loafers with old man socks (you know the ones, super thin dress socks that should only be worn with suits and dress shoes?). And mismatched old man socks at that. And he was just being all cuckoo.

But my eyes are always peeled. I work minutes from where Paul Newman lives. I'm always on the lookout for a severely old man with bright blue eyes carrying a bottle of salad dressing.

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